Ryann'dra Auspaztic.
17 & old :X gloomybear = sexxxx
i lost my way, i lost my way
while skipping down the yellow brick road
i lost my way [puff the magic dragon :O]
electro yourself, baybeh anti-violence; say no to plastic bags!!!
they don't deserve you, anyways ♥♥♥
Friday, October 31, 2008
post 72: ugh..
okay okay i know
it's a picture of the Eiffel Tower
and it's not even in Germany
Cassie's going to Germany EOY
n her mum allowed me 2 taggie
have yet to ask Dad
Germany; necessary expenses paid
with Cassie
now if i can go
we just need to make sure i don't
GET DRUNK, CLIMB THE GERMAN PARLIAMENT BUILDING AND SCREAM "HEIL HITLER" 10x!
hope i get to go!
:)
oh P.S. BIO PAPER ROCKED!
6:47 PM
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
post 71: dedicated to anti-Prop8ness
i'm not gonna write a big introduction but i'll cut to the chase; Homosexuals are people just like you and me and they deserve EVERY right to marry In fact, they're more capable of loving than those homophobes who support Prop 8 Why, oh why, do people alienate the "homos" just because they love someone, and it "doesn't seem right"? It's pretty stupid isn't it? How would you feel if your love for someone else was condemned? How would you feel if you couldn't even hold hands and walk down the street with the one you love, without getting scowls in you direction? How would you feel if you couldn't even BE with the one you love, because of a law a bunch of homophobes passed in parliament? Just because homosexuals love people who are the same gender as them, it doesn't mean they're any different from straight people How much would it hurt to try and hide the person you really are, just because society disapproves of your "condition"? And what's the big deal with categorizing homosexuality to the likes of prostitution, incest or even paedophilic acts? Is it so wrong to love? Stop using religion as an excuse to discriminate homosexuals Because really.. how many of us are actually able to follow what our "religion" teaches? Just because people CANNOT accept the fact that there're people who do not conform to the majority of the modern society we live in, DOES NOT MEAN THEY SHOULD BE ABLE TO TAKE AWAY THE RIGHTS OF PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY LOVE People are meant to be unique and self-acceptance is just one of the greatest qualities that homosexuals have and for that, they have my admiration and respect. Banning gay marriage is just like banning marriage on a whole, Only that this bill discriminates homosexuals Whatever happened to equality? SAY NO TO PROP8 they're gay and they're here to stay so DEAL WITH IT YOU HOMOPHOBES
8:52 PM
FUCK PHYSICS I AM GOING TO CRY
i'm sorry i'm sorry what i said was.. FUCK YOU was that clear enough for you?
today was fun :3 got my hairdye! met Mira, Hashir n Chrissy with Aisyie after Physics P2 it was TORTURE and itd be a MIRACLE if i get a fucking C6 for my goddamned Physics anyway walked around got my leave-in hair moisturiser :) got EMaths P2 tomorrow so yeah doom FUCK Os, once again AND FUCK YOU, INVENTOR OF FUCKING PHYSICS [70th post & counting]
7:34 PM
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
chairoplanes
i miss the Royal Show
the Chairoplanes
i've only been on it once
i was 9
and i was so scared i closed my eyes
but now i want a chairoplane ride
because i want to forget
i want to stop feeling empty
and for once i actually want to be apathetic
what is it that i feel?
it feels so weird
like my heart's being bounded and gagged
or perhaps kidnapped
i hate this feeling
it makes me want to rip my goddamned heart out and chew on it
god forbid.. it's physics tomorrow
i lost my drive
fuck it
fuck it
fuck it
i'm still confused
not over physics
but how i feel about you
8:57 PM
Monday, October 27, 2008
uhh
♪find a way - the used♫
the used ; the sexiest band alive
5:10 PM
hmmmmm
to see a washing machine in your dream
shows that there are a few things that you need to deal with
i am thankful for that washing machine in my dream
because really
it just shows i need to find a new way to get to Malaysia
shrugs
and i've yet to find out what the ferris wheel means too
god save our souls
oh cut my goddamned hair again
by myself :3
[yes i'm proud of it shhhh]
and i tell you, the hair i killed is enough to donate to the Cancer Foundation
shrugs
can't wait for purple hair!
1:10 AM
Sunday, October 26, 2008
ugh
LIFE IS BORING THE SHIT OUT OF ME
2:10 PM
Saturday, October 25, 2008
douse the lights
life will forever be a bore finished reading In The Miso Soup by Ryu Murakami yes another thriller except this time, it's in Japan psychological thrillers are just thrilling they dont scare the shit out of you they just thrill you shrugs HISTORY ON TUESDAY ultimate moodkiller SLIPKNOT IS THE ULTIMATE SEX and i guess i WILL make a list of things to do after Os Cass, Adith n me alr have a random list [POWERPUFFFFFFFF!! tuuuuhnuutuhtuhtuhtuhtuuuh] oh yes there WILL be videos they'll probably be completed in Jan cos Adith's gonna be away so i guess we'll come up with a new list i need a flexy job CTBGNation really really really needs more customers i know the blog hasn't been updated but it will soon, i hope goddammit we need business please support and approach us screw the blog just go to me or Cassie's blog and tag us or something ANYTHING! just help :3
4:25 PM
Friday, October 24, 2008
I FUCKING LOVE SLIPKNOT SINGALONG TIME!
Go!
Stapled shut, inside an outside world and I'm Sealed in tight, bizarre but right at home Claustrophobic, closing in and I'm Catastrophic, not again I'm smeared across the page, and doused in gasoline I wear you like a stain, yet I'm the one who's obscene Catch me up on all your sordid little insurrections, I've got no time to lose, and I'm just caught up in all the cattle
Fray the strings Throw the shapes Hold your breath Listen!
I am a world before I am a man I was a creature before I could stand I will remember before I forget BEFORE I FORGET THAT!
I'm ripped across the ditch, and settled in the dirt and I'm I wear you like a stitch, yet I'm the one who's hurt Pay attention to your twisted little indiscretions I've got no right to win, I'm just caught up all the battles
Locked in clutch Pushed in place Hold your breath Listen!
I am a world before I am a man I was a creature before I could stand I will remember before I forget BEFORE I FORGET THAT!
I am a world before I am a man I was a creature before I could stand I will remember before I forget BEFORE I FORGET THAT!
My end It justifies my means All I ever do is delay My every attempt to evade The end of the road and my end It justifies my means All I ever do is delay My every attempt to evade THE END OF THE ROAD!
I am a world before I am a man I was a creature before I could stand I will remember before I forget BEFORE I FORGET THAT!
I am a world before I am a man I was a creature before I could stand I will remember before I forget BEFORE I FORGET THAT!
I am a world before I am a man I was a creature before I could stand I will remember before I forget BEFORE I FORGET THAT!
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, OH!
8:14 PM
AMaths.. Kill Me
i know i shouldnt be panicking BUT AMATHS WAS FRICKIN AWESOME, K? I COULD DO EVERYTHING but now im panicking because the smarties say it's hard WHICH MEANS I SUCK D:
6:45 PM
Thursday, October 23, 2008
sharp objects..?
Sharp Objects by Gillian Flynn is so frickin awesome IT'S BETTER THAN YOUR ROMANCE NOVELS, CASSIE shrugs anyway yeah it was fucking awesome free day today gonna meet KCudsJoe later to see KIERAAAAAAA gotta read up my formulas and shit n practise my physics D: n history i dont make sense rite now i need a nap good night.
1:10 PM
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
FUCK Os
okay so if i've never gotten a D7 for English and i got a B3 for English in Prelims, DOES IT MEAN THAT THERE'S HOPE I WILL DO WELL??!! because apparently the teachers mark us down because THEY DON'T WANT TO GIVE US FALSE HOPE *rolls eyes* shrugs anyway had A. Maths today I COULD DO EVERY QUESTION and i just found out i lost like.. quite a few marks D: but it's okay I DID EVERYTHING! hopefully they give method marks or something :( oh bell curveeeee PLEASE OH PLEASE OH PLEASE LET PEOPLE SUCK REALLY BAD AT A. MATHS!! GOD I WASTED SO MUCH PAPER, OKAY?! i lost like 8 marks :( so the max marks i can get is like 90%? I HOPE I DO! WEEEE life is balls FUCK YOU AMATHS
English was a braindrainer wrote on Greed yes yes my character kills her brother because she wants the family fortune only wrote the killing scene but bits of dialogue here and there but i hope it shows the topic it begins with her in the room and going crazy killing her brother with a letter opener [yeslameiknow] and screaming "It's all MINE I WANT IT YOU KNOW IT'S MINE" and her going to jail and getting killed in an electric chair yes surprise surprise her name is Kiera Ryann HAHAHA oh dear i hope it's not irrelevant! anyway, comprehension topic was on cats but other than that i hope i did okay then again i wouldn't be surprised if i get a C6 or a D7 for English :( okay chill, Ry Amaths tomorrow need to read up a bit more and practise here and there and i guess i'll be prepared GOD, IF YOU HEAR ME, PLEASE LET THE EXAMINER NOT BE CRANKY ON THE DAY HE MARKS MY SCRIPT! i used so much effort for summary and sitch writing! and compre! and compo too! ohhhhhh :( cries
9:47 PM
Monday, October 20, 2008
quote
"No, Vimmie wouldn't go to an asylum. He'd be the one sending us there.." 'Josh! Ryann! Asylum! Now!' -Joshie
9:25 PM
hmmm
Okay by Macy Gray :) listen to it it's good, i guess well to me it is today's Chem paper was good :) EVERYTHING I STUDIED FOR CAME OUT!! I EVEN MANAGED TO SNEAK A NAP!! :3 English tomorrow and A.Maths the next gotta practise A.Maths :O wish me luck, aite? and good luck to you guys who're taking Os too :) wish i could go for halloween :(
8:12 PM
Sunday, October 19, 2008
O-levels
okay okay O-levels are up TOMORROW so yeah can't bring phone along AND may be like AWAY from the compie & shit so yeah :) okay here are my O-level dates so don't expect me to reply your texts or answer your calls i'll get back to you as soon as i'm free 20th Oct, 21st Oct, 22nd Oct, 24th Oct, 28th Oct, 29th Oct, 30th Oct, 31st Oct, 3rd Nov, 10th Nov, 12th Nov, 13th Nov yes my O-levels dates HA! job hunting on 14th Nov, maybe SMBND, Os!!!
8:03 PM
bleargh
today is boring Chem tomorrow i miss everyone i miss Cassie i miss Christa i miss Joe i miss Ami i miss Aisyie i miss Ish i miss Ren i miss Fika i miss Haikel i miss Emmie i miss Zaza i miss Col i miss DK i miss Fauzie i miss Izzy i miss Mira i miss Tazzy i miss the people at church i miss the people in Perth i miss 4EA i miss the acquaintances i had in SSS and i promise you i am not lying
2:23 PM
Saturday, October 18, 2008
wtf
i cannot tell you how incredibly stupid and impulsive i am seriously really fucking stupid hahahahahaha yes i cause trouble for Izzy n his mum i get used by a kiddo so he can get through to my awesome friend i scare myself shitless over someone *slaps hand onto face* Ryann is officially STUPID and now i'm going to have to deal with someone i don't want to see at all yeah i'm still pissed fuck you guys for reading this and fuck me and my stupidity even more i feel so fucking stupid, i think i'll just shut up for like EVER enough said RYANN IS STUPID
3:15 PM
uh quiz
A . People who have been tagged must write their answers in their blogs. B. Tag 8 people to do this quiz & those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who they are tagged by & cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by. C. Continue this game by sending it to other people. 1. i 2. dont 3. really 4. give 5. a 6. fuck 7. , 8. actually
1 . What have you been doing recently ?- nothing 2 . Do you ever turn your cellphone off?- nothing 3 . What happened at 10am today?- playing guitar hero on wii 4 . When did you last cry ?- almost today 5 . Believe in fate / destiny ?- idfc 6 . What do you want in your life now ?- good O-level grades 7 . Do you carry an umbrella when it rains or just put up your hood?- put up my goddamned hood 8 . What’s your favourite thing to have on your bed ?- comforter 9 . What bottom are you wearing now ?- shorts 10 . What’s the nicest thing in your inbox says?- idk go figure 11 . Do you tend to make a relationship complicated ?- dont ask me 12 . Are you wearing anything you borrowed from someone ?- yeah. PE shirt from Adith 13 . What was the last movie you caught ?- IDFK 14 . What are you proud of ?- nth 15 . What does the oldest text message in your inbox says ?- name card 16 . What was the last song you sang out loud ?- everything i'm not by the veronicas 17 . Do you have any nicknames ?- Ry, Ryann, Ryanndra 18 . What does your last receive text msg says ?- i'll text u tomorrow afternoon 19 . What time did you go to bed last night ?- cant rmb go away 20 . Are you currently happy ?- no 21 . Who gives you best advice ?- Joe or Cass 22 . Do you eat whipped cream straight from can ?- love it 23 . Who did you talk on the phone last night ?- Joshie n Vimmie 24 . Is anything bugging you right now ?- yeah 25 . What / Who was the last person to make you laugh ?- Colin Santa Maria 26 . Do you wear toe socks ?- yeah 27 . Who was the last person you missed a call from ?- Christine 28 . Have you ever had your heart broken ?- yeah now duh 29 . What annoys you most in a person ?- depends on my mood 30 . Do you have a crush on someone ?- im crushed? 31 . Have you ever done cocaine ?- i can only dream 32 . What is the colour of your room ?- whitish 33 . Would you kill some one you hate for a billion dollars ?- and get away with it? hmmmmm.. nope.. 34 . Do you believe in the saying ‘ talk is cheap ‘ ?- yes. 35 . Who was the last person to lie in your bed ?- me 36 . Who was the last person to hug you?- hafiz's mummy :3 37 . Did anyone see the last person you kissed?- yeah. DUH. 38 . Do you have a life?- what kind of question is THAT? 39 . Have you ever thought someone died, when they really didn’t?- almost 40 . What is the reason behind your profile song?- what song? 41 . Who was the last person you saw in your dream?- idk 42 . Last time you smiled?- just now after reading Colin's dream 43 . Have you changed this year?- yeah. alot. 44 . What are you listening right now?- nothing? 45 . Are you talking to someone when you doing this?- no 46 . Do you walk with your eyes open or closed?- both 47 . Is there a quote you live by?- alot. which one? "hypocrisy; man's greatest vice" is my fave. 48 . Do you want someone you cannot have?- YES 49 . Have you ever played an instrument?- yeah 50 . What was the worst idea you’ve had in this week?- try get hafiz back 51 . What were you doing last night at 11pm?- surprisingly, physics 52 . Are you happy with your love life right now?- what love life? 53 . What song best describe your love life?- walk away by funeral for a friend 54 . Does the person know that you like him/her?- he's fully fucking aware and yeah its complicated 55 . Who always make you laugh?- ANYONE? :D 56 . Do you speak languages other than english?- a little of malay and chinese.. 57 . Favourite website(s)?- none 58 . What’s your middle name?- nil 59 . What are you doing tomorrow?- IDFC 60 . What do you think you are like?- lol 61 . Who will you choose to die with?- my hamtaro 62 . Where have you been today?- out 63 . What game do you play often?- none 64 . Who are you missing right now?- people. 65 . If you had to chose between a friend and a lover, who will you chose?- depends on who 66 . What are you doing right now?- talking to Christa 67 . Which primary school are you from?- PLMGPS, YangZheng 68 . Name 3 colours that you like?- black black black 69 . What emotion do you like to show?- idk rite now 70 . What is your life to you?- idk? 71 . If you have something troubling you, what will you do?- depends. usually it's sweep it under the carpet 72 . Who did you last chat with on msn today?- D. Ho 73 . Who do you admire most?- idk la 74 . Which month were you born in?- april 75 . How are you feeling right now?- VERY messed up 76 . What is the time now?- 0021 77 . What kind of person do u think the one who tagged you is?- Col? oh he's awesome :). he brightens my day with his silly jokes and he's such a darl 78 . What colour did you use to dye hair?- black but it turned navy blue 79 . Why are you doing this test?- im bored 80 . What do you do when you’re moody?- stone, nothing, be silent, try to hide it 81 . At which age you wish to get married?- 25..? 82 . Who is more important to you?- idfk 83. If today is the last day of your life, what will you do?- oh.. spend the rest of my 23hrs doing wth i want 84 . Who is the person you trust the most?- Cass, Joe, Ami, Christa 85 . Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after a rain?- huh? in a literal context or a comparative context? 86 . If you have a dream come true, what would it be?- idk? 87 . What is your goal for this year?- get through Os 88 . Do you believe in eternity love?- huh? 89 . What feeling do you love most?- being tickled 90 . Do you really think its Global Warming now?- im feeling cold. 91 . What feeling do you hate the most?- idk 92 . Do you cherish every single friendship of yours?- very much so 93 . Do you believe in God?- no. yes. idk. go figure. 94 . Who cares for you most?- i really dont know. ive yet to find out but for now i'll say Ami, Cass, Christa n Joe 95 . What do you think is the most important thing in your life?- my life? 96 . What will you bring when you fight?- nothing. i'll let them whack me up. 97 . What have you done regretted doing in your whole life?- nothing. i'm too lazy to bother 98 . What would you do if no one cared for you any longer?- as usual, LIVE WITH IT. like how im doing so now 99 . What if your boyfriend/girlfriend two-timed you?- oh.. nothing.. find someone to fuck and get over it, probably. 100 . HOW DO U FEEL NOW?- SHITTY
12:03 AM
Friday, October 17, 2008
Stay strong, Fika
5:03 PM
Thursday, October 16, 2008
it sucks being confused or more like, pissed i spend the whole day killing my eyes and yeah it sucks i feel drained and strained i just want to get out and DO SOMETHING it sucks because everytime i have nothing to do i end up being miserable over the same things again and just when i think i've found a solution, i'm back at square one i used to be so far away from what i'm feeling now but now i'm not it sucks it's like i'm riding a merry-go-round with a radius of 2cm ARGH!
6:20 PM
classic quotes
3:28 PM
LIES
pictures tell a thousand words but pictures OF words stop beating around the bush stop messing with me already I'M SICK OF ALL YOUR LIES [don't be perasan, it may just NOT be you who i'm referring to] and to that CRACKHEAD who gave out my number, STOP BEING A MOTHERFUCKING DRAG QUEEN, OKAY? JUST TELL ME WHO THE FUCK YOU ARE.
1:26 AM
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
i feel so drained and tired
i want so badly to take a nap
or at least get myself out of feeling so messed up
i hate myself for trying
hoping is a waste of time
but i can't help it
i'm a fucking pathetic loser
and the faster i get over this shit, the better
SCREW YOU GUYS, I AM GOING.. going...... OFF!!
3:26 PM
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
what exactly did i do wrong?
5:34 PM
uhh
10 things i hate: 1) Happy Families [they make me jealous because i'll never have one like that] 2) Death Stares [doesn't everyone?] 3) Disturbed Sleep [cranky] 4) False Friendship [i'm sorry, i have nothing to give] 5) Happy Couples [it HURTS so bad, okay?] 6) Lies [because with them come false hopes] 7) Paper [they kill trees and they're all around my room. and all i can do is scribble and doodle; his name] 8) Playas [because they just don't get it that they are not getting in my pants and my heart belongs elsewhere] 9) Pork [yuck yuck yuck yuck yuck] 10) Myself [because i'm just so pathetic and until today, i'm not over him]
gotta find something to get addicted to LOOKING FORWARD TO THE 13TH surprise surprise then again what the hell to 300 over people, i probably look like the biggest 2-faced liar to ever hit home *hides face* okay maybe i'll reconsider going ha then it'll probably be a happier Jalan Raya for lotsa people if i didn't go :S
12:23 PM
Thursday, October 9, 2008
uhh.
MULTIGRAIN MILK TASTES LIKE SHIT oh CTBGNation has its first few pix up! :D CTBG CLICK HERE
6:45 PM
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
i miss you [but this time, you'll never guess who it is] [hahabitchesimissME]
6:57 PM
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
bored
LALALA
you know what's funny? when someone uses profound language and doesn't make sense in the end hahahaha joke of the day hinthinthint
6:40 PM
CTBG
okay, kaka no angry blog post this time, aite? okay got good news and bad news lets start with good news since it always brightens up ppls days okay bleh stop beating round the bush, ry well, CTBGNation now has 2 or 3 items up for sale! lalalalala! okay there're red and blue pinafore dresses up and a micromini done up bad news is, my phone is gone so no pictures of it but we'll model it soon and blah so we can get the photos up :S now to find models ANYONE INTERESTED?!
3:30 PM
Sunday, October 5, 2008
gah
it sucks when you can't get what you really want/love because of something you can't change
there're days i wish i didn't exist and there're days i wish i was alone with him just him and be like how we were before but i can't
[overdramatics; the result of heartbreak and denial and a sudden realisation]
4:05 PM
Saturday, October 4, 2008
i miss perth so much i know it sounds pathetic but i really miss it it's been 3yrs now and i still miss perth i mean i'm not even from perth gosh but i guess i gotta be thankful for what i have now be thankful that i'm in singapore with wonderful kickass friends that make each day brighter than before so i guess i won't need to miss perth now because once i'm away there'll be hell lotta people to miss oh and friday was the first time i sang the national anthem one line; "sama sama menuju bahagia" i think that's not even a line but that would be the first time i've sung the national anthem in secondary school thanks shaz, once again now i have kickass side piercings MUAHA thanks to cass for contacting her ex again now i'm all sore but i guess it's the price i pay :) oh bits of my fat came out with the needle IT WAS SO COOL! [yes i'm a fatass and i really don't care]
7:20 PM
laughs
"OMG THERE'S BODY FAT IN THERE!"
classic, i tell you, and you'll never guess what ;)
6:51 PM
Friday, October 3, 2008
6:15 PM
Thursday, October 2, 2008
blooddyy hellll
i am bored *stares blankly* all hail the rain and it's inpredictability my heart is palpitating for some unknown reason i'm excited bout bedtime because that's when i get to sleep looking forward to tomorrow too i want my piercings so bad so so so bad so so bad so bad so so bad so so so bad so so bad so bad i want my piercings *heart breaks* ugh.. i don't make sense today so that means i def won't make sense tomorrow
5:38 PM
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
i should be studying i made my friendster profile gay i should be studying selamat hari raya i should be studying maaf zahir dan batin i should be studying i really should be studying i will study after i get dressed [don't think dirty, aite?]